Ryan Lochte Becomes King Of Watersports In Las Vegas

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ryan lochte pees water sports in las vegas

Ryan Lochte’s post-Olympic festivities continued this weekend in Las Vegas, where the swimmer celebrated his 28th birthday by peeing in the pool.

Olympic record breaker Michel Phelps declined to take the trek out west knowing there’d be pools and watersports involved with Locthe. “The watersports community is going to love the guy, but it’s just not my scene,” the swimming phenom said.

The poolside party kicked off Saturday afternoon with Lochte donning a revealing pink Speedo and chugging champagne from the bottle.Ryan-Lochte kind of urban water sports pink speedo

Then, when asked what it felt like to be back home in the States, the gold medalist flashed his diamond grill, said “Jeah,” and peed himself.

“Dude pees anywhere,” said Lochte’s friend and fellow Olympic simmer Cullen Jones. “It’s like he’s still in the Olympic pool in London. It’s disgusting.”

The celebration continued into the evening at the ultra-exclusive Club Marquee where Lochte did three shots of Patron, then peed on a barstool.

This was followed by a quick visit to the Asian-themed nightclub, TAO, where he peed on the dancefloor, then in some guy named Derek’s sake bomber.

The final stop was Spearmint Rhino where Lochte reportedly made it rain with $100 bills, then made it rain again by urinating on the strippers.

Just before sunrise, Lochte was passed out back in his suite at the Palazzo Hotel. While he managed not to piss in his bed, he did accidentally shit his pants. By Sunday afternoon everyone was pretty much sick of Lochte and just wanted to go home.

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10 comments
272723cassidy
272723cassidy

Ryan lochte needs to be on that show more I loved everything Joan asked him

LUV2CHEER62
LUV2CHEER62

all I have to say is damn. I was smiling and nodding the whole time xD damn. Just damn *drools*

Gunner Peters
Gunner Peters

I like Ryan Lochte. But I still like Michael Phelps! What else can I say! I'm an '08 kinda guy.

Mzdiva924
Mzdiva924

Lmao he had no problems taking his clothes off I mean he's practically naked when he swims anyway lol! He's so hot!